I'm leaving here. Packing my bags and heading out of town. This show is over. Okay, enough with the drama. I've got your attention now? Good.
There is something wrong with my account. It apparently has something to do with the original account being over 7 years old. I needed to upgrade it, but for some reason there are technical errors, beyond my control that do not allow me to upgrade. I have tried contacting blogger and gmail, but no one is willing to figure this out. THere are several people with the same problem.
So now i have exported this entire blog onto a new one. You'll find all my old posts going back several years, but there are still things i have to work on. So from now on I'll be posting over at Take Them By The Hand, my new home. I hope you enjoy the new site. Not too much of a difference, a little less of an aggressive name, and a new graphic, that's about it. Enjoy!
Friday, May 18, 2012
Thursday, May 17, 2012
The Why's and The What's
Now that we have established our new eating schedule and routine, I suppose I should explain the reasoning behind this all. Food habits and culture in North America are very unhealthy. We eat junk food, and forget the fruit and veggies all too often. We thrive on processed, artificial foods, instead of making healthy foods from scratch. We eat because we are bored, or because we are upset. We develop diabetes, become obese, and die from complications due to our eating habits.
This is an extreme window of what is happening in North America. We as a family are not at such a level, but we can always improve the way that we eat. Eating several bowls of cereal a day and skipping lunch is a bad path to head down!
I want to present to the boys why it is that we eat, and how we can eat in order to live a healthy, satisfying, long life. It is good to start with a healthy attitude towards food, and the benefits of eating a varied diet. I teach the boys why certain foods are better for us than others, and what the benefits of certain foods are to our body.
They have been learning about the vitamins in fruits and vegetables, and what each one does to help us grow, develop and maintain a healthy body and mind. Thanks to the pep talk about spinach ( and a little help from Popeye) Jack now LOVES spinach. He eats it raw, or cooked and enjoys it. Now he doesn't eat a ton of it, but a handful of leaves at lunch, or a little bowl of spinach soup at dinner is all that is needed.
With this in mind, we have adopted the eat to live, but enjoy doing it mentality. We eat well, and enjoy eating because it provides us with the energy to enjoy the activities we love to do. We vary our diet so eating does not become a mere chore. We also vary out diet to provide all the essential vitamins and minerals required for healthy living.
We are also exploring food with all of our senses. We talk about the texture, the density, the smell, the appearance as well as the taste. Often children dismiss a new food based solely on it's appearance, but if we encourage our children to explore a new food with all of their senses, they are more likely to taste it, and appreciate it.
Now we don't eat 100% made from scratch, healthy food every day, every meal. We indulge in a treat every once and a while, but we do so knowing that it is just that, a treat. Something special. No matter what we eat, we put an emphasis on how we prepare it and how we eat it. We try to do these things smoothly, calmly and slowly. Eating slowly aids in digestions, so all those nutrients can be absorbed properly, and one has a better appreciation for one's food.
More on this soon!
This is an extreme window of what is happening in North America. We as a family are not at such a level, but we can always improve the way that we eat. Eating several bowls of cereal a day and skipping lunch is a bad path to head down!
I want to present to the boys why it is that we eat, and how we can eat in order to live a healthy, satisfying, long life. It is good to start with a healthy attitude towards food, and the benefits of eating a varied diet. I teach the boys why certain foods are better for us than others, and what the benefits of certain foods are to our body.
They have been learning about the vitamins in fruits and vegetables, and what each one does to help us grow, develop and maintain a healthy body and mind. Thanks to the pep talk about spinach ( and a little help from Popeye) Jack now LOVES spinach. He eats it raw, or cooked and enjoys it. Now he doesn't eat a ton of it, but a handful of leaves at lunch, or a little bowl of spinach soup at dinner is all that is needed.
With this in mind, we have adopted the eat to live, but enjoy doing it mentality. We eat well, and enjoy eating because it provides us with the energy to enjoy the activities we love to do. We vary our diet so eating does not become a mere chore. We also vary out diet to provide all the essential vitamins and minerals required for healthy living.
We are also exploring food with all of our senses. We talk about the texture, the density, the smell, the appearance as well as the taste. Often children dismiss a new food based solely on it's appearance, but if we encourage our children to explore a new food with all of their senses, they are more likely to taste it, and appreciate it.
Now we don't eat 100% made from scratch, healthy food every day, every meal. We indulge in a treat every once and a while, but we do so knowing that it is just that, a treat. Something special. No matter what we eat, we put an emphasis on how we prepare it and how we eat it. We try to do these things smoothly, calmly and slowly. Eating slowly aids in digestions, so all those nutrients can be absorbed properly, and one has a better appreciation for one's food.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Almost Summer
It feels like summer, and when it feels like summer, the teepee comes out of hiding! Hope everyone is enjoying this wonderful weather, and fingers crossed that is lasts!
And here are some snippets from our mother's day picnic!
mini beef pies and nectarine cakes!
roasted vegetable picnic bread!
Sunday, May 13, 2012
It's Been a Week
Today marks the seventh day of our shift in eating. It is also Mother's Day today. We celebrated with a lovely trip to the swap meet (my favourite things to do on Mother's Day, or any Sunday in the summer), then a big picnic at the Government House with my mom, my sister, her husband, my husband and the boys. We then spent the rest of the afternoon and evening in the back yard.
Cory made two raised vegetable beds for me, set up the teepee and relaxed (finally)! We decided to just eat left overs as there were bits from the picnic left over as well as bits of other meals from the week. It was relieving to not cook for once, as I've been cooking a lot lately. I have been enjoying cooking, but it is starting to get a bit hard to make things that the kids will like, while still varying the meals. We can only have rice so many nights in a row!
Having a diverse menu over the week has always been a priority for me. Usually try to only have chicken twice, and beef or bison once. This leads to a few vegetarian dishes and some egg dishes mixed in there. I also try to mix up the types of dishes. Sometimes a casserole, sometimes a stir fry, or soups and sandwiches. I also do a lot of separate cooking, where I do a main, side grain and side vegetables. There is a lot of variety and the kids are nice a familiar with that, change.
Over the next week I am going to explore the phrase, "Live to Eat or Eat to Live." I was quite surprised to find that, according to the book I am reading, the French culture is more about eating to live rather than living to eat. I am definitely of the mind set that I eat to live. If I'm not hungry, I don't eat. I do enjoy food, and try to make what I eat delicious and enjoyable. I have never been one to count calories, or worry about the fat and sugar content of foods that I consume, as long as they taste good, and satisfy my hunger. Anyways, something for us all to think about until the next blog post.
Hope you all had a lovely weekend, and for those of you who are mother's, a very Happy Mother's Day.
Cory made two raised vegetable beds for me, set up the teepee and relaxed (finally)! We decided to just eat left overs as there were bits from the picnic left over as well as bits of other meals from the week. It was relieving to not cook for once, as I've been cooking a lot lately. I have been enjoying cooking, but it is starting to get a bit hard to make things that the kids will like, while still varying the meals. We can only have rice so many nights in a row!
Having a diverse menu over the week has always been a priority for me. Usually try to only have chicken twice, and beef or bison once. This leads to a few vegetarian dishes and some egg dishes mixed in there. I also try to mix up the types of dishes. Sometimes a casserole, sometimes a stir fry, or soups and sandwiches. I also do a lot of separate cooking, where I do a main, side grain and side vegetables. There is a lot of variety and the kids are nice a familiar with that, change.
Over the next week I am going to explore the phrase, "Live to Eat or Eat to Live." I was quite surprised to find that, according to the book I am reading, the French culture is more about eating to live rather than living to eat. I am definitely of the mind set that I eat to live. If I'm not hungry, I don't eat. I do enjoy food, and try to make what I eat delicious and enjoyable. I have never been one to count calories, or worry about the fat and sugar content of foods that I consume, as long as they taste good, and satisfy my hunger. Anyways, something for us all to think about until the next blog post.
Hope you all had a lovely weekend, and for those of you who are mother's, a very Happy Mother's Day.
Friday, May 11, 2012
Better and Better
Last night was a hard one, well only for a few minutes. Jack decided to skip the afternoon gouter (snack), and by 6pm was a bit cranky! Also Dylan didn't nap, so was also a bit cranky. This led to about 15 minutes of hard times. As soon as the outburst occurred, I set to work getting dinner ready and Cory calmed them down and distracted them with a drawing game. By 6:45 we were all sitting down enjoying a nice meal.
Unfortunately I had to rush off to a client meeting, but we still got to spend a bit of time together, eating. Once home, heard from Cory that the kids went off to bed very easily. Having a later dinner has made the bedtime routine much easier. As there is only time for books, brushing teeth and tuck in, there are not more arguments about stopping building lego, or stopping doing whatever activity the kids got in-gauged in after dinner. It feels like we have more control, and the kids are happy to just snuggle up to a good book right after dinner, then off to bed.
Tonight, again Dylan had a little meltdown (again no nap today!) at the table. He was upset about the glass that he got, so once we worked through it, he was more than happy to sample .... and completely clean his plate! Tonight's dinner was something new for the boys, and something I have not had since moving out on my own. I made pork chops with delicious ginger, lime reduce. Really so amazing. Ten times better than apple sauce that's for sure! We also had rice and cilantro lime beans. The recipe called for lentil,s and the beans turned out to be a poor substitute, lesson learned.
I also snagged a little dessert from the corner store. Every Wednesday and Friday Rekka ( a neighbour) cooks up several authentic east indian dishes ..... Best in our city in fact! Tonight there was a great dessert that i knew the kids would love, Mango Mousse with Cardamon. It was good because it introduced a new spice to them, paired with an old favourite fruit of theirs. We had a little contest (i'm not big on contests, but I knew this was the only way to slow them down) to see who could take the longest in eating their desserts. Jack won by a mile, and I really was trying my hardest to go slow. We talked all about the meal and the way that the pork tasted. How that even though it comes from the same animal as bacon and ham, it is a very different taste and texture. Then of course we went full into describing and talking about the mousse .... oh how I love mousse!
After dinner we promised the boys to play a quick game instead of read books, then off to bed they went. No protests, no crazy, erratic behaviour from Dylan. Just calm, happy, satisfied little boys! This is really working people, really.
Unfortunately I had to rush off to a client meeting, but we still got to spend a bit of time together, eating. Once home, heard from Cory that the kids went off to bed very easily. Having a later dinner has made the bedtime routine much easier. As there is only time for books, brushing teeth and tuck in, there are not more arguments about stopping building lego, or stopping doing whatever activity the kids got in-gauged in after dinner. It feels like we have more control, and the kids are happy to just snuggle up to a good book right after dinner, then off to bed.
Tonight, again Dylan had a little meltdown (again no nap today!) at the table. He was upset about the glass that he got, so once we worked through it, he was more than happy to sample .... and completely clean his plate! Tonight's dinner was something new for the boys, and something I have not had since moving out on my own. I made pork chops with delicious ginger, lime reduce. Really so amazing. Ten times better than apple sauce that's for sure! We also had rice and cilantro lime beans. The recipe called for lentil,s and the beans turned out to be a poor substitute, lesson learned.
I also snagged a little dessert from the corner store. Every Wednesday and Friday Rekka ( a neighbour) cooks up several authentic east indian dishes ..... Best in our city in fact! Tonight there was a great dessert that i knew the kids would love, Mango Mousse with Cardamon. It was good because it introduced a new spice to them, paired with an old favourite fruit of theirs. We had a little contest (i'm not big on contests, but I knew this was the only way to slow them down) to see who could take the longest in eating their desserts. Jack won by a mile, and I really was trying my hardest to go slow. We talked all about the meal and the way that the pork tasted. How that even though it comes from the same animal as bacon and ham, it is a very different taste and texture. Then of course we went full into describing and talking about the mousse .... oh how I love mousse!
After dinner we promised the boys to play a quick game instead of read books, then off to bed they went. No protests, no crazy, erratic behaviour from Dylan. Just calm, happy, satisfied little boys! This is really working people, really.
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Good, or Maybe Even Great!
Some great, great news! Jack's other teacher ( the one in the story yesterday is a once a week teacher, so this one i will talk about is there four days a week) is very supportive of the idea that Jack not have snacks. She told me that he seemed more calm and attentive in class this morning, and when it was snack time he just quietly went over to the reading area and looked at books until snack time was over.
At lunch today I had our first course (veggies, olives, ham and cheese) all laid out so we could start eating as soon as we arrived home. I invited the kids to the table and popped the pasta dish under the broiler to melt the cheese. The boys sat patiently, and I heard Jack say, "Oh no Dylan. We have to wait for mom before we can start." WOW really? this is a first! The rule of waiting until everyone is at the table isn't something that I have stressed too much, but apparently it is one that Jack has really picked up on.
Now I am not a huge fan of Jack telling Dylan what to do, but this was just fine. A bigger brother helping his brother (in a nice way) to follow the rules. I am seriously in shock! The improved manners and behaviour from both the boys has been phenomenal! I am excited to bring more to them and have even more positive outcomes of this new approach to eating and enjoying meals.
So far I haven't really mentioned what it is that we are eating and how I am doing all of this. Right now we are eating pretty much what we always have been, but I am introducing new things (in the form of soups) to the kids. I serve them just a couple of tablespoons of soup and all they have to do is taste it. So far the soups have gone over well, even the spinach soup (with Jack at least). It is a lot of work getting three big meals prepared every day but it's doable.
I spend an average of one and a half to two hours of cooking time in the kitchen per day. Before this new eating schedule I was probably spending just as much time in the kitchen, but less time actually cooking. Then there is clean up. I try to get breakfast dished done before i start lunch, and the while Jack is at school in the afternoon I try to get the lunch dishes done. After dinner cory usually cleans up. It all goes well ...... as long I we take the time to unload the dishwasher. Otherwise dished start piling up. Speaking of which I have to clean up from our delicious, satisfying lunch!
At lunch today I had our first course (veggies, olives, ham and cheese) all laid out so we could start eating as soon as we arrived home. I invited the kids to the table and popped the pasta dish under the broiler to melt the cheese. The boys sat patiently, and I heard Jack say, "Oh no Dylan. We have to wait for mom before we can start." WOW really? this is a first! The rule of waiting until everyone is at the table isn't something that I have stressed too much, but apparently it is one that Jack has really picked up on.
Now I am not a huge fan of Jack telling Dylan what to do, but this was just fine. A bigger brother helping his brother (in a nice way) to follow the rules. I am seriously in shock! The improved manners and behaviour from both the boys has been phenomenal! I am excited to bring more to them and have even more positive outcomes of this new approach to eating and enjoying meals.
So far I haven't really mentioned what it is that we are eating and how I am doing all of this. Right now we are eating pretty much what we always have been, but I am introducing new things (in the form of soups) to the kids. I serve them just a couple of tablespoons of soup and all they have to do is taste it. So far the soups have gone over well, even the spinach soup (with Jack at least). It is a lot of work getting three big meals prepared every day but it's doable.
I spend an average of one and a half to two hours of cooking time in the kitchen per day. Before this new eating schedule I was probably spending just as much time in the kitchen, but less time actually cooking. Then there is clean up. I try to get breakfast dished done before i start lunch, and the while Jack is at school in the afternoon I try to get the lunch dishes done. After dinner cory usually cleans up. It all goes well ...... as long I we take the time to unload the dishwasher. Otherwise dished start piling up. Speaking of which I have to clean up from our delicious, satisfying lunch!
Trouble with Change
I am surprised at how quickly the children have been adapting to the changes in rules and eating times. It always seems to be the adults that have the most trouble with a new routine, or rule. Yesterday Jack and I talked about the idea of not bringing a snack to school. We'd had a huge, hour long breakfast and everyone left the table satisfied. I sent Jack to school with his water bottle and a small container with some juice in it, just in case he needed a bit of a boost.
I had a brief talk with his teacher that I didn't pack a snack for Jack, on purpose. I didn't want anyone thinking that i forgot! She seemed a bit flustered, and didn't say much. At lunch time I came to pick up Jack to take him home for lunch, and it was the teachers turn to have a talk with me.
She informed me that I should always pack a snack for Jack, just incase he want to eat it, as an option. She went on to say that she requires the children to all sit nicely, and have their snack together without children getting up from their chairs and disrupting the class. I thought this meant that Jack had had trouble sitting down and behaving himself. When I asked if Jack had had trouble sitting with the other children at snack time, she said, no, he was very well behaved. But ......
She went on to say that Jack was a bit more excitable and wrangy close to lunch, probably because he didn't have a snack she thought. She then went on to say that most of the boys were actually like that, but it was only Jack that didn't have a snack. Hmmm.....
She then mentioned that even she gets hungry between breakfast and lunch and the children definitely would feel the same way. All kids need a snack, was the message once again. Jack hadn't complained of being hungry during school, so I just stated that for the rest of the week, we would not be providing a snack and we'd see how it goes. She added in at the end that even providing a muffin, so that he could choose to eat it or not would be a good idea. I gritted my teeth and politely said that we wouldn't be doing that, then we left to eat lunch at home. On the way home I asked Jack if he'd had a hard time at school, or if he felt hungry and he said no. Good enough for me!
Why is it that a change in routine is often harder for adults than it is for children?
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
The Same Day
if you have not been following, I would recommend reading the post before this, The Lunch That Got Better.
Okay now that you are up to speed I have a little tale of the rest of that day. Dylan fell asleep on our walk home after dropping Jack off at school. He slept for a long time, a lot longer than I usually let him. And when he awoke a few minutes before it was time to head back to the school, he freaked out. Yelling and crying, and telling me to go away.
Whenever my kids tell me to go away, I do give them space, but I am always in a spot where I can see them, and where they know I can hear them clearly. So after about ten minutes I wheeled him outside (he never left his stroller after dropping jack off). The fresh air helped and he quickly calmed down. Once we reached the school he was in fine spirits and very happy to see Jackson. During Dylan's nap I had prepared a special snack (or gouter in france) for the boys. This afternoon snack, only for children, is a hightlight of every child's day. It often consists of a big piece of baguette with butter and chocolate or nutella ..... oh yes indeed! I wish gouter was for adults too!
I decided to make them mini muffins, some with chocolate chips and others with ginger and molasses. Jack is not a fan of chocolate (dear god!) but the ginger molasses muffin I make are a favorite. On the walk home I spoke about what was waiting for them at home. Not a bribe, or a treat, just a nice sweet snack. I don't think that gouter is always a sweet, but some of the time it can't hurt, especially the first time!
Once home we .... um, er, the boys, savoured their muffins as we spoke about what was to be made for dinner. I had suggested home made pizza earlier in the day and that was met with cries for take-out pizza, from Prima Strada of course! However with a stomach full from lunch and a nice treat in their hands, the boys happily agreed on home made pizza. I also mentioned that we'd have soup. My plan was to puree a vegetable with a bit of chicken broth and introduce something new that way, before our pizza main dish.
The rest of the afternoon, right up until 6:30pm was spent with the boys doing their own things (more on this later) and me reading, doing dishes and thinking about what to have for our soup. With the boys occupied, I pleasantly made dinner, with no interruptions and we ate at 7:15pm. This is a HUGE departure from our normal 5:30 or 6pm dinner times of the past. The boys however seemed very content and only expressed a hungry stomach a few minutes before dinner was on the table. Smooth sailing.
Dinner was, fantastic, though a bit silly, but very fun and lively. With one slice of pizza left Dylan started acting out and jumping off and on his chair. After a couple of warnings I simply took away his plate. This caused a crazy run around and an attack or two at me. He doesn't get angry or upset, just crazy, like laughing and being naughty. I am never sure how to handle this. We sorted things out and now the boys are in bed. No more bedtime snacks and happy, content little kids most of the day. My afternoons are a treat now, instead of a tiring bother. I used to count down the minutes until Cory walked in the door, but the past two days I have sailed through without even a thought. Big changes, all for the better :)
Okay now that you are up to speed I have a little tale of the rest of that day. Dylan fell asleep on our walk home after dropping Jack off at school. He slept for a long time, a lot longer than I usually let him. And when he awoke a few minutes before it was time to head back to the school, he freaked out. Yelling and crying, and telling me to go away.
Whenever my kids tell me to go away, I do give them space, but I am always in a spot where I can see them, and where they know I can hear them clearly. So after about ten minutes I wheeled him outside (he never left his stroller after dropping jack off). The fresh air helped and he quickly calmed down. Once we reached the school he was in fine spirits and very happy to see Jackson. During Dylan's nap I had prepared a special snack (or gouter in france) for the boys. This afternoon snack, only for children, is a hightlight of every child's day. It often consists of a big piece of baguette with butter and chocolate or nutella ..... oh yes indeed! I wish gouter was for adults too!
I decided to make them mini muffins, some with chocolate chips and others with ginger and molasses. Jack is not a fan of chocolate (dear god!) but the ginger molasses muffin I make are a favorite. On the walk home I spoke about what was waiting for them at home. Not a bribe, or a treat, just a nice sweet snack. I don't think that gouter is always a sweet, but some of the time it can't hurt, especially the first time!
Once home we .... um, er, the boys, savoured their muffins as we spoke about what was to be made for dinner. I had suggested home made pizza earlier in the day and that was met with cries for take-out pizza, from Prima Strada of course! However with a stomach full from lunch and a nice treat in their hands, the boys happily agreed on home made pizza. I also mentioned that we'd have soup. My plan was to puree a vegetable with a bit of chicken broth and introduce something new that way, before our pizza main dish.
The rest of the afternoon, right up until 6:30pm was spent with the boys doing their own things (more on this later) and me reading, doing dishes and thinking about what to have for our soup. With the boys occupied, I pleasantly made dinner, with no interruptions and we ate at 7:15pm. This is a HUGE departure from our normal 5:30 or 6pm dinner times of the past. The boys however seemed very content and only expressed a hungry stomach a few minutes before dinner was on the table. Smooth sailing.
Dinner was, fantastic, though a bit silly, but very fun and lively. With one slice of pizza left Dylan started acting out and jumping off and on his chair. After a couple of warnings I simply took away his plate. This caused a crazy run around and an attack or two at me. He doesn't get angry or upset, just crazy, like laughing and being naughty. I am never sure how to handle this. We sorted things out and now the boys are in bed. No more bedtime snacks and happy, content little kids most of the day. My afternoons are a treat now, instead of a tiring bother. I used to count down the minutes until Cory walked in the door, but the past two days I have sailed through without even a thought. Big changes, all for the better :)
The Lunch That Got Better
I was going to entitle this post, "The Lunch from Hell", but it only started out that way. Over breakfast this morning the boys and I discussed the idea of Jack coming home for lunch. Not a half day, which is something we only do once a week now. Jack seemed to like the idea, though I had my doubts that he'd be able to easily make his way back to school after lunch. We made an agreement to try it for the rest of the week, and even if tears were involved, Jack would go back to school after lunch.
Our breakfast, by the way, was a fabulous, a full hour long! Great conversation and no hurry for any of us to leave the table. It helps that my children are up before 7am. So now onto lunch. I spent about 45 minutes preparing lunch, so that as soon as we got Jack home, we'd be ready to spend the entire lunch hour eating and talking.
Bad new bears, as soon as I came to the school. He wanted to bring home a special writing kit that the kids each get once a month. He wanted to spend lunch hour writing cards to his friends instead of eating ..... oh non! We couldn't have that. The poor little guy was rather upset at me the WHOLE walk home. I didn't give him much sympathy, which i kind of regret now. At least a little empathy would have been nice, but no, I was focused on the meal ahead and I spoke excitedly about it, as did Dylan. This made for resentment of said meal right away.
Once we were home Jack refused to come to the table, but eventually made his way there. Note to self, don't enter the house through the bak door that leads to the toy room, this is a recipe for disaster! Once up, he proclaimed that he hated everything I had made, and was not going to eat it. He told me that he would have a talk with Cory when he got home, so that Cory didn't have to be married to me anymore and Jack could have a new mom. Wow. I just sat there calming eating my lunch, and simply stated that if he is speak in an unkind way he can leave the table.
He sat there quietly for a while, just making snotty faces at me now and again. I had made a lunch that I thought both boys would love. Breaded chicken strips, lemon butter (brown) rice, and then a couple of extras for them to try, baked parmesan zucchini and mushrooms then a salad with radishes and balsamic dressing.
Apparently everything I made was terrible and completely tasteless according to Jack. I was a horrible cook, and I made everything gross. Again I simply stated that he could leave the table if he continued to speak that way. He sat again quietly. Slowly he came around and tried al least one bite of everything. He thought hte salad was okay, minus the radishes, but the zucchini and mushrooms were not fit to be eaten. Dylan ate mostly everything, though is not a big fan of lettuce or zucchini.
Once Jack settled down, I opened the conversation up to future food discussion. What would we have for dinner? What would Jack like for lunches? This boy of mine came full circle and was just beaming as he described many different dishes, that he adored. The lunch ended well with a good amount of food eaten by both the boys, and at least one nibble from everything "new" on their plates.
We went back to school and had a lovely walk, looking forward to the next lunch we'd have. I have learned a lot from that one meal, just like I did with yesterdays lunch.
Even though they do not get a choice in what is served, it is important that they enjoy at least one thing on their plate. Jack has given me a large list of ideas, and I will incorporate those along with new dishes into our lunch and dinners for the next few weeks. This is going to be a slow change. I cannot expect the kids to just accept this new way of eating with excitement and vigour. There was one thing Jack said at the height of his frustration that resonated with me. He said, "Mom, this isn't fun. I want this to be fun." Yes I agree, food must be fun, which translate from kid to adult as exciting and pleasurable. A goal for our next meals.
Our breakfast, by the way, was a fabulous, a full hour long! Great conversation and no hurry for any of us to leave the table. It helps that my children are up before 7am. So now onto lunch. I spent about 45 minutes preparing lunch, so that as soon as we got Jack home, we'd be ready to spend the entire lunch hour eating and talking.
Bad new bears, as soon as I came to the school. He wanted to bring home a special writing kit that the kids each get once a month. He wanted to spend lunch hour writing cards to his friends instead of eating ..... oh non! We couldn't have that. The poor little guy was rather upset at me the WHOLE walk home. I didn't give him much sympathy, which i kind of regret now. At least a little empathy would have been nice, but no, I was focused on the meal ahead and I spoke excitedly about it, as did Dylan. This made for resentment of said meal right away.
Once we were home Jack refused to come to the table, but eventually made his way there. Note to self, don't enter the house through the bak door that leads to the toy room, this is a recipe for disaster! Once up, he proclaimed that he hated everything I had made, and was not going to eat it. He told me that he would have a talk with Cory when he got home, so that Cory didn't have to be married to me anymore and Jack could have a new mom. Wow. I just sat there calming eating my lunch, and simply stated that if he is speak in an unkind way he can leave the table.
He sat there quietly for a while, just making snotty faces at me now and again. I had made a lunch that I thought both boys would love. Breaded chicken strips, lemon butter (brown) rice, and then a couple of extras for them to try, baked parmesan zucchini and mushrooms then a salad with radishes and balsamic dressing.
Apparently everything I made was terrible and completely tasteless according to Jack. I was a horrible cook, and I made everything gross. Again I simply stated that he could leave the table if he continued to speak that way. He sat again quietly. Slowly he came around and tried al least one bite of everything. He thought hte salad was okay, minus the radishes, but the zucchini and mushrooms were not fit to be eaten. Dylan ate mostly everything, though is not a big fan of lettuce or zucchini.
Once Jack settled down, I opened the conversation up to future food discussion. What would we have for dinner? What would Jack like for lunches? This boy of mine came full circle and was just beaming as he described many different dishes, that he adored. The lunch ended well with a good amount of food eaten by both the boys, and at least one nibble from everything "new" on their plates.
We went back to school and had a lovely walk, looking forward to the next lunch we'd have. I have learned a lot from that one meal, just like I did with yesterdays lunch.
Even though they do not get a choice in what is served, it is important that they enjoy at least one thing on their plate. Jack has given me a large list of ideas, and I will incorporate those along with new dishes into our lunch and dinners for the next few weeks. This is going to be a slow change. I cannot expect the kids to just accept this new way of eating with excitement and vigour. There was one thing Jack said at the height of his frustration that resonated with me. He said, "Mom, this isn't fun. I want this to be fun." Yes I agree, food must be fun, which translate from kid to adult as exciting and pleasurable. A goal for our next meals.
Jump Right In
I have decided to take action right away. I am on chapter five of French Kids Eat Everything, entitled "Food Fights" and so far this book is fabulous. Usually I read through a book completely, before implementing it's teachings. This book, however, just makes sense right from the beginning. There are ideas, that one can start with right away. Several points from the books are ones that are already important to myself. For some reason I have not made these points important to my children. I suppose I just didn't want to impose another rule at the table, in fears of a backlash!
There are two big ones that I plan to change right away:
1. Setting the table. As a child, I always remember having the table set. Just a simple arrangement of place mats, forks, knives, spoons and glasses. Sometimes a table cloth, but not always. I have had a lot of trouble getting my children (and husband) into this routine. In fact I gave up on it completely and put all the utensils in a "cute" little holder on the table, so no on ever had to set the table. I liked the idea of it, as I wasn't constantly popping up from the table if a knife, or spoon had been forgotten, or if the kids suddenly decided chop sticks were the best way to eat their pizza. Secretly it bothered me, the clutter of always having something extra on the table, but it made things easier, so I lived with it. No more I say! We will set the table!
When i cracked that table cloth and smoothed it over the table, there were gasps of delight and surprise from my kids yesterday. Always good to get them excited about the meal they are about to enjoy!
2. You may leave when you are done. Growing up we almost always stayed at the table until everyone was done. If there was a particular person (usually me) who was being stubborn and not eating the food they had in front of them, them everyone else would eventually migrate away from the table. Tis was rare. In our family now, as soon as the kids are done (they barely eat a thing in anticipation of the play time next) they bounce out of their seats and begin to harass us (well, mostly just my husband) until we've wolfed down our food and sprung outside or downstairs, leaving all the dishes on the table and all the pots a mess. I like to take my time and eat, but the pressure the kids put on myself and Cory were too great (we thought), so we'd cave and often hurriedly eat up to appease the kid racket around us.
For the past three meals now, we've all sat around and talked, and ate at a slower pace, enjoying our food. We talk about the food we are eating, and also about our day and what we want to do later on. It felt relaxing, not panicky. We still got some time to play before bed, but the mood was better than I'd hoped for. The kids were easier with transitions, and change as we'd already spent to much time together at the table. Jack was a bit fidgety and hopped off his chair a number of times, but he always returned when asked, with little or no complaints.
So there you have it! Part Two, the things that have changed in just one day :)
There are two big ones that I plan to change right away:
1. Setting the table. As a child, I always remember having the table set. Just a simple arrangement of place mats, forks, knives, spoons and glasses. Sometimes a table cloth, but not always. I have had a lot of trouble getting my children (and husband) into this routine. In fact I gave up on it completely and put all the utensils in a "cute" little holder on the table, so no on ever had to set the table. I liked the idea of it, as I wasn't constantly popping up from the table if a knife, or spoon had been forgotten, or if the kids suddenly decided chop sticks were the best way to eat their pizza. Secretly it bothered me, the clutter of always having something extra on the table, but it made things easier, so I lived with it. No more I say! We will set the table!
When i cracked that table cloth and smoothed it over the table, there were gasps of delight and surprise from my kids yesterday. Always good to get them excited about the meal they are about to enjoy!
2. You may leave when you are done. Growing up we almost always stayed at the table until everyone was done. If there was a particular person (usually me) who was being stubborn and not eating the food they had in front of them, them everyone else would eventually migrate away from the table. Tis was rare. In our family now, as soon as the kids are done (they barely eat a thing in anticipation of the play time next) they bounce out of their seats and begin to harass us (well, mostly just my husband) until we've wolfed down our food and sprung outside or downstairs, leaving all the dishes on the table and all the pots a mess. I like to take my time and eat, but the pressure the kids put on myself and Cory were too great (we thought), so we'd cave and often hurriedly eat up to appease the kid racket around us.
For the past three meals now, we've all sat around and talked, and ate at a slower pace, enjoying our food. We talk about the food we are eating, and also about our day and what we want to do later on. It felt relaxing, not panicky. We still got some time to play before bed, but the mood was better than I'd hoped for. The kids were easier with transitions, and change as we'd already spent to much time together at the table. Jack was a bit fidgety and hopped off his chair a number of times, but he always returned when asked, with little or no complaints.
So there you have it! Part Two, the things that have changed in just one day :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
